Twas the night before Christmas, when deep beneath our house
A drainpipe was cracking as quietly as a mouse.
The stockings were hung by the hung by the chimney with care
But pressure was building of which we were unaware.
The children were busy getting dressed for the Eve,
The events to unfold would be hard to believe.
And Kim’s in the kitchen, and Doug’s gone to church,
Both settling down and completing their work.
When from the drain in the bathroom there arose such a…
(there are some images best left to the imagination),
Kim sprang from the kitchen to see what’s causing “it.”
Away grabbing towels she flew like a flash,
As the drainpipes keep gurgling and spewing up “trash.”
Up the drainpipes “it” ran then flowed down through the floor vents
Filling the basement with other than sweet holiday scents.
A quick Google search and a few phone calls placed
Then the plumber arrived a broad grin on his face
(they charge more for Christmas Eve calls).
He wasn’t dressed in red or carrying a sack
But wrenches and snakes were his plan of attack.
When he came back at midnight to try once again
He still was maintaining his Christmas Day grin.
Five days (and three plumbers) later everything’s flowing again
And now we’re the ones sporting broad Christmas grins.
The 29th brought our postponed Christmas dinner
And everyone agreed that smoked turkey’s a winner.
Our first Christmas in ‘Bama is one we’ll remember
And we’ll look back and laugh – maybe by next December
So we know this card’s late but to our friends far and near
Merry Christmas to all and a Happy New Year!